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- Where does one even begin in talking about this past week? I just wrote an email to all of my 2020 brides & grooms and I said, “Things seemed to go from “eh it’s not so bad” to “we’re closing Disney World” within the space of just a few days & I don’t know about you, but that major shift threw me into some crazy anxiety!” The last few days truly have felt like a roller coaster. It’s been, insane. I’ve never felt such a strange concoction of panic & reassurance, anxiety & peace, worry & relief all at the same time in my entire life.
On Thursday morning, I got so panicked that I ended up deleting the Facebook app off of my phone. I simply couldn’t take the barrage of information – the graphs, statistics, blog posts, news articles – I couldn’t take it any more. And it wasn’t just the tidal-wave of information that was flooding my social media feed, it was the not-knowing whether any or all of it was true. Are these statistics accurate? Is this news article stretching the truth? Is this blog post a straight-up-lie? It was just too much. So, I deleted my Facebook app & have been “blissfully uninformed” ever since. It was crazy the amount of relief I suddenly had just from saying “Goodbye” to Facebook (obviously, I can still access Facebook on my computer, but I only sit down at my computer once or twice a day, while I have my phone constantly in my back pocket).
That doesn’t mean I’m completely living in a state of “unaware” – I’ve been relying on Derrick to give me the major updates. He handles all of this stuff so much better than I do, so I just let him keep up with it all.
So, that’s where I currently am: attempting to keep a balance of knowing what’s happening in the world, but not letting it push my mental state over the edge. I spent all morning Thursday panicking that I needed to get to the grocery store & “stock up” – while at the same time not wanting to go (and not just because I hate the grocery store – but because both Braelynn & Leander are getting over “regular” cold/coughs & I truly did not want to take them out). I finally decided that I truly did not need to go – that Derrick could run to WalMart & pick up the handful of items that we actually needed on his way home – and we would be fine.
So, I deleted Facebook from my phone and I made the conscious decision to do something different. I picked up my camera, carted my kiddos upstairs, & took their photos playing with each other. Then we all got dressed & went outside into the sunshine. Because, was sitting on my couch, letting my kids watch endless TV shows, while I stewed in a pot of worry, doing anything productive for my mental state? Nope. And that’s where I’ve been pretty much ever since.
Talk about a strange place to be though! I began to put together a WalMart pick-up order – setting it a few days in advance so I could add things to it & we could go pick it up later tonight – and I just got a call from WalMart saying that they had canceled my pickup order. Their truck had not arrived & their shelves are empty, so they could not fulfill my order.
We have food – we have toilet paper – we have cleaning supplies. I went grocery shopping at the beginning of this week (just a normal, typical grocery shopping trip) and I made the decision not to go crazy with buying extra stuff. Now, I’m wondering if I should have bought a few extra things – but it’s okay. We’ll be fine.
Obviously, it’s a scary time for everyone. We’re just doing our best to be smart. We are staying home, not going to any amusement parks (they’re all closed anyways), and washing our hands a lot. You can just feel this weight on the atmosphere made up of everyone’s worry. Things are changing on an hourly basis & the fear of the unknown truly is the scariest part. Schools have been shut down, state of emergencies have been declared – it’s scary stuff. My goal is not to let it overtake me. I don’t want my kids to have memories of their Mom going into full-blown panic-mode over something they don’t even need to know exists.
It’s just crazy out there. When people were warning that this week would be insane with Daylight Savings Time, a full moon, and Friday-the-13th all falling in the same week – I don’t think anyone realized those three things were just the tip of the iceberg. - MOVING ON – we have had some bright spots to our week! The first being that my sister Ellen & her husband welcomed their brand new baby girl into the world yesterday! Baby Layla Grace was born yesterday afternoon & I was privileged to sneak into the hospital last night to take a few photos of the new family of four! (We didn’t really “sneak” into the hospital, but technically myself, my Mom, and the new big sister Alethea weren’t all allowed back to visit at the same time & the nurses were kind enough to let us all in together. It’s just another one of the outcomes of this crazy week!) Mama & baby are doing amazing & I’m just obsessed with my new little niece!
- Derrick’s parents are currently here with us for the weekend. They came in last night – Derrick’s Dad is replacing the windows on our 3rd floor for us, plus Derrick & his Dad are working on fixing up Braelynn’s swingset (the main beam was rotting out, so they’re replacing it & making sure the rest of the structure is safe for this summer – we’ll definitely be putting some “miles” on it in the next few weeks!)
[…] this photo looks familiar – I’ve taken a similar photo before! Here is last year’s version: #290 and 2018’s version: #192.This year’s version is obviously brought to you, in part, by […]